who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Randomize