five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
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