some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
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