Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
