would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
