I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
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