Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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