Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
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