Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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