I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I met the friendliest cop last night
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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