found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
