dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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