Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
