i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize