it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
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