Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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