I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
