Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Randomize
