STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Fuck appropriateness.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Randomize
