Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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