quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
tell me about the fingering
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
