very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Randomize