can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I lost the right to judge tonight
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
