: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
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