Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize