good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize