I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Sext me about skeletons
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize
