New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize