is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
