I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
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