I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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