i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
