I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
My sheets look like a crime scene.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Randomize
