I'm really into asian looking animals
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize