bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Randomize
