its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize