sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Randomize
