It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
