it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize