It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
