you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
