You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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