I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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