We're like a lot better than the average bears
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
