My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Randomize
