My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
