I wannas sexs uuuuu
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
you win again, gameday.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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