I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
it wasn't lemon gatorade
hell yes lets make some ravioli
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
