I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
