I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
