Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
