What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize